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"The first thing that's wrong with being a science-fiction writer today is that the present has caught up with the future and surpassed it."
- Peter Watts
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| Computer Humorist | ||
| A computer acquires the ability to tell original jokes. |
Mike (short for Mycroft Holmes) is the Lunar Authority mainframe computer.
| MIke... was the weirdest mixture of unsophisticated baby and wise old man. No instincts (well, don't think he could have had), no inborn traits, no human rearing, no experience in human sense - and more stored data than a platoon of geniuses.
"Jokes?" he asked. "Let's hear one." "Why is a laser beam like goldfish?" Mike knew about lasers but where would he have seen goldfish? Oh, he had undoubtedly seen flicks of them and, were I foolish enough to ask, could spew forth thousands of words. "I give up." His lights rippled. "Because neither one can whistle." I groaned. "Walked into that. Anyhow, you could probably rig a laser beam to whistle." He answered quickly, "Yes. In response to an action program. Then it's not funny?" "Oh, I didn't say that. Not half bad. Where did you hear it?" "I made it up." Voice sounded shy. "You did?" "Yes. I took all the riddles I have, three thousand two hundred seven, and analyzed them. I used the result for random synthesis and that came out. Is it really funny?" "Well... As funny as a riddle ever is. I've heard worse." |
| Technovelgy from The Moon is a Harsh Mistress,
by Robert Heinlein. Published by GP Putnam in 1966 Additional resources -
|
Compare to the meson filter from The Jester (1951), by William Tenn.
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'...each of them is a neural mapping of the mind of a Tibetan monk who actually lived.'
'...there's a narrow belt where the climate is moderate.'
'The leg was to function, in a way, as a servo-mechanism operated by Larry’s brain, through the mediation of the electronic brain in the leg.'
'... every veephone on the continent would display, over and over, two propositions.'
'Completely silent, accurate up to about twenty meters. No recoil...'
'He wore spectacles with thick wavy lenses. The spectacles were intended to make him not only half blind, but to give him whanging headaches besides.'
